Today’s Happy Note: I was feeling a lot of anxiety last night and sent my therapist a rant email and she sent me back a very soothing message. She really is a major comfort. It’s pretty sweet that she is there for me even on the weekend.
Thank you everyone for your kind, insightful comments yesterday. One thing that a lot of people pointed out was that I am still me, regardless of my size. Additionally, most people on the beach are not looking at me at all! They have better things to do than pay attention to the minutiae of my body. And in fact I have better things to do than pay attention to the minutiae of my body!
I feel like I have been lazy today. The weird thing is that I can’t decide if this is actually true. I mean, I did stuff, I just feel like it wasn’t enough stuff. I feel like Sundays should be devoted to getting-things-done. I didn’t even workout (although I did walk maybe two or so miles). Meh. I guess maybe some Sundays are meant for total relaxation, perhaps? What do you prefer — crazy busy Sundays that prepare you for the week ahead or lazy Sundays?
I did manage to pick myself up off the couch for a quick Adventure to the farmer’s market and the Cathedral. Fresh local peaches from the farmer’s market in summer are truly heavenly. They might be my favorite food, ever. I can’t even eat store bought ones anymore. Other finds: crunchy cucumbers, rainbow chard, pea shoots, and mixed lettuces.
Started the day with a giant, real NY bagel (seven grain) with walnut raisin cream cheese (which, by the way, is cream cheese perfection). I feel like bagels are a traditional NY Sunday brunch, so how could I say no? I went with the family. I am not a big bread person, but I really like a good bagel once a week or so. And the cream cheese is wonderful because it’s so full of fat and keeps me full for hours. I had this around eleven and didn’t even begin to think about eating again until after four.
My late afternoon snack was a SIAB made with vanilla soy milk, a splash of kefir, vanilla hemp/whey protein powder, lots of ice, frozen blueberries and frozen cherries. Toppings: kashi heart to heart cereal and Justin’s maple almond butter.
I also had a tiny bowl of cereal afterwards to satisfy my giant cereal craving.
At some point between this and dinner I had a tiny handful of nuts and a piece of chocolate.
Dinner=meat. Dear meat, I love you. I will never, ever leave you.
This is a multigrain wrap stuffed with home made meatballs (from farmer’s market ground beef), jarlsberg cheese, and baked yellow squash. I made my meatballs with EVOO, salt, lemon pepper, garlic, and dried basil. I had lots of cukes and carrots on the side.
At this point in my life, I know that eating meat (of all varieties — red, poultry, seafood) is the right choice for me. I physically feel so much better with it in my life. I have more energy, stay fuller longer, and I feel healthier on the inside too. I try to eat red meat once or twice a week, along with a few servings of fish/chicken/turkey/shrimp, etc. I know that some people may have trouble digesting meat or they just don’t like it or it does not work for them in some way, and I absolutely respect that. But I crave and need protein. And not just any protein: meat protein. And if I have learned anything about my relationship with food in the last few years, it’s that denying what my body wants is asking for trouble.
Phew, glad I got that out. After dinner I had two spoonfuls of Maranatha dark chocolate peanut spread before making my real dessert.
Coconut peanut butter protein ice cream! Topped with dark chocolate.
So pillowy. I also had a Godiva dark chocolate truffle.
I won’t continue posting all my meals for long. It’s just something that I think I need to do for myself for a few days. I am getting used to “closing the kitchen” after a small-ish dessert, and not mindlessly munching my way through the evening. I am hoping this will become a habit! There are so many other things I like to do in the evening instead, especially reading. There is never enough time for all the books I want to read, sadly.
I am a little nervous about working again full time this week. I have lots to do, but hopefully I will give myself a break if need be. I also need to make sure I get enough sleep. Goodnight friends!